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Personal Statement
"What do you want to be in the future?" a question to which I had a definite reply, but always felt anxious answering.
"Uh, actually a football player," I'd usually stutter next.
"Here in Saudi? Is that even an option?" would be a typical reply.
Ever since I knew that kicking a ball was a sport, I believed that my life was destined to revolve around football. As a 7-year-old, my eyes glommed to the TV during matches. Growing up, I spent countless afternoons emulating World Cup tactics in matches with my cousins. But as I grew older, more conscious, I became more cognizant of the fact that while female football existed, it was completely out of the norm in my society. And with that increased awareness, I incrementally began to desire football as more than just a hobby, but rather a destiny to be relentlessly coveted and sought after.
At the age of 14, I started looking for a women's football team, even though the prospects of finding one remained very slim. I searched from one place to another, and asked one person after the other without any luck. A couple of months later, my friends and I decided to rent a field to play regularly. Miraculously, when visiting the field, there was a women's football team renting the field on the same day. Since, it was apparent that we were a small group of people, and the team wanted to recruit more players, they granted us the opportunity to join them. Without a moment's hesitation, I ecstatically accepted their offer.
Being a member of the team, I finally felt like I was behind the steering wheel, slowly but surely driving toward my goal; playing football professionally as a Saudi female. With the journey being full of bumps and hurdles initially, the road was definitely getting smoother. My teammates were inspirational girls who shared the same obsession with the sport as I did. As our belief in our abilities grew, we found the outlook on us becoming more favorable. Not long after, we found ourselves participating in the Gulf Cup tournament in Dammam. Even though we only got to the quarterfinals, we felt that this was only the onset of many more opportunities to come, and we were not wrong; soon enough, the first women's football league was organized, and I was amongst the first batch of Saudi football female players participating.
Being the first to do something turned out to be extremely intimidating. Now, I needed to practice intensely, every single day, for hours. Couple that with academic pressure and we have the best recipe for blowback. The next thing I knew, I was lying on the pitch during practice in excruciating pain, with a sprained ankle. Amidst the pain, thoughts clamored; would I still play in the league?
Although this seems like an athlete's worst nightmare, I didn't allow it to overpower me. Despite the fact that it's relatively larger than the ones I stomped over before, it was another bump in the road. I went to physiotherapy sessions and used unconventional healing methods, and they worked! I played in the league, and our team took this one home. Holding the cup, I realized that all the glory this moment contained stemmed from all the setbacks we overcame.
Today, I am more than proud to say that I have been chosen to join the first women’s Saudi futsal national team. I was handled the opportunity to train in camps daily to prepare for the Kuwait Gulf Cup tournament, and the Asian tournament. To see that now my dream is no longer dismissed as the frivolous wishes of a child gave me the satisfaction I waited for for a long time. From feeling like success was a far fetched fantasy to living it in reality, I understood that setbacks are minor steps taken to launch one further into one's own trajectory. And now when asked, "what do you want to be" I no longer hesitate.
